I’m absolutely in love with Mark Manson’s recent post on The Law of Fuck Yes. It’s something I wish I had put into practice much, much sooner. But here we are.
The Law of #FUCKYES simply states that you shouldn’t waste your time on anyone where a mutual fuck yes is not present. The keyword here is mutual. We all deserve lives of great passion and fulfillment, and if fuck yes is not present on either side, we lose. We’re destined for hardship, for struggle, for not living up to our full potential. For missing out on real happiness. For constantly wondering why we’re not good enough for the BEST THINGS life has to offer.
But living to the law of fuck yes isn’t always easy. Our ego gets in the way. Love can blind us. We turn to excuses.
Mark starts with a simple, but powerful statement: Why would you ever choose to be with someone who is not excited to be with you?
Unfortunately, this is a question I know all too well.
For almost a year, I was in a relationship that was an absolute FUCK YES for me, and a very timid, whisper of a yes for him. The timid yes eventually turned into a heart-breaking “I can’t.” Should I have waited as I did for months hoping that the whisper would turn into a resounding full-on, everything in all caps with tons of emojis and exclamation marks statement? Today, I say no. Today I set boundaries because I believe, truly believe, I deserve better. But back then, I didn’t. Back then, I waited.
It’s easy to hold on to hope that someone will change. And sometimes, they do. But holding on to a no, maybe, or timid yes is not something that anyone should do. Ever. Don’t wait for someone to suddenly realize you’re awesome, or to suddenly feel a fuck yes for someone you’re not that into. Instead, choose to move on. Choose to love and honor yourself, to pursue big happiness. Look for other fuck-yes’s in your life, like your relationship with yourself, your job, your friends, or your favorite hobby.
Wait for the big, unquestionable fuck yes. Whether it comes back to you from someone who is already in your life or [more likely] an amazing person you’ve yet to meet who will blow anyone else out of the water.